What if.....

April 3, 2019

 

This quote really spoke to me today, "The most important thing in your life is not what you do, it's who you become." Dr. Willard

 

 

 

As I pondered this quote, I was forced to examine if this is really true and If I am actually living this out. Sadly, I must confess, that sometimes I get caught up in the hype of our societal norms.

 

 

 

These norms are not normal! They are based on a performance driven, competitive digital world. They are based on everyone's highlight reels. They are based only on what others want you to see.

 

 

 

They are the voices that tell us to push our teens to join every club, be the best in sports, take all the AP classes, apply to the best colleges, work themselves to exhaustion and fill their hearts with anxiety about not keeping up with their peers.

 

 

 

Instead of looking at our teens as the unique individuals that they are, we tend to look toward what everyone else is doing, and then try to 'keep up with the Jones'.

 

 

 

What we are missing what is good for someone else's teen might not be what your teen needs.

 

 

 

What happens when you get caught up in this frenzy? Do you get irritated with your teen, nag, push, pull away, or withdraw when they don't meet the standards that others are producing? If so, how is that affecting your relationship with your teen?

 

 

 

I wonder what would happen if instead of focusing on all the outward pressures, we changed our focus a bit?

 

 

 

What if we were determined to help our kids know how much they are loved, valued and appreciated?

 

 

 

What if we focused on the great lessons they were learning as they faced their everyday obstacles and helped them manage disappointments?

 

 

 

What if we focused on character, integrity, hard work, grit?

 

 

 

What if we told them about the great plans that God has for them and how He will never leave them or forsake them?

 

 

 

What if we helped them understand what is going on with their emotions and how to manage them?

 

 

 

What if we helped them learn how to think and solve problems on their own without us giving them the best possible answer? (this is sad but true: the next generation is bringing their parents on job interviews with them; some parents are negotiating their young adults salaries-for real)

 

 

 

What if we choose to discover what their real passion is and how they can grow in their strengths?

 

 

 

What ways can you help your teen become the best version of themselves?

 

 

 

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Doreen Steenland 
101 Brighton Ave.
Spring Lake NJ 07762
732-245-6057

LivingFullLifeCoaching@gmail.com

 

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