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Reflections from a dance competition Day 4: The above picture is my youngest daughter, Sarah, doing what she loves!

What happens when you hope for something and you don't get it?

I mean, there are times when we all do the best job we can and still do not get what we were hoping for.

When we don't get what we've hoped for, whether just or unjust, we tend to look at others and compare ourselves to them.

John Maxwell says one of two things can happen when you compare. "Either you see the other person as far ahead of you and you feel discouraged, or you perceive yourself to be better than the other person, and you become proud."

It's so easy to compare ourselves to others, but it's not good for us. We do not grow by living in this state of comparison. Let's face it, if we don't get what we desire after doing our part, we should at least take advantage of the lessons we can learn.

One author has been known to say, 'I'm sorry that you won, that means there is little for you to learn from this'. Wow! Now that's a different perspective.

I'm not sure I agree 100% with that statement, after all when you win, you can learn how to win graciously and humbly. You can learn how to push through obstacles and overcome them. The list is extensive the lessons that can be learned.

I guess the point of the matter is this: whether you win or lose, don't compare yourself to others and see what lessons you can learn so you will be even better next time.

What can you learn from your latest disappointment?

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Doreen Steenland 
101 Brighton Ave.
Spring Lake NJ 07762



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